I’ve been reading quite a bit lately (online) about the inflatable holiday yard art fad. You know, giant pumpkins and Frankensteins at Halloween, Macy’s-style turkeys on Thanksgiving, and the plethora of items people put out in their yards at Christmas. I guess the most-wanted item this year is the inflatable snow globe. People must really like these things, because they sell out as fast as stores can bring them in. Personally, I don’t see the attraction, but then, I’m not like most people. Take that as you like.
It took two years of neighbors asking questions before the entire town knew what this sign said. A typical conversation went like this:
Neighbor: Hey, what’s with that sign in your yard?
Me: It’s a Christmas decoration.
Neighbor: Yeah, but what is it? What does it mean?
Me: Well, I’ll help you figure it out. Now, in your mind, replace the letter “L” with a cigarette. Then what would the sign say?
Neighbor: Uh, “no smoking?”
Me: Correct! Now, put the “L” back where the cigarette was. What does the sign say?
Neighbor: Uh, “no L?”
Me: Right! No “L”!
Neighbor: Uh, I still don’t get it.
Me: (singing) No L, No L, No L, No L, born is the king of Israel.
Neighbor: Oh! I get it! Noel!!
Me: (trying not to sound condescending) Yep, that’s it.
We’ve had this sign now for maybe four or five years, and no one’s ever duplicated it. Which is fine with me – I like having something unique and original in my yard. I don’t think I’ll ever have an inflatable thing. I don’t know where I’d store it and besides, the dog would probably pee on it. I mean, I don’t have anything against inflatables and the people who own them. It’s just that inflatables aren’t my style. So if you want to, go ahead, put up your inflatable yard art, and show it off with pride.
Just don’t tell my dog where you live.