First, an update: I managed to get a full night of sleep last night. I still had anxiety nightmares, but they weren’t as bad as the previous nights’.
And now for the Good News! Over the past 18 months or so, we’ve been very concerned with Mary’s attitude. She was very negative on herself, and at one point even voiced the idea of harming herself. We went to counseling, and it helped a little, but then the insurance ran out and we had to quit. However, a couple of weeks ago, Mary had an epiphany. After one particularly bad morning, trying to get ready for school, Mary came up to me and said, “I think my negative attitude is getting me in trouble. I need to focus more on being positive on myself.” I was thrilled, and naturally I encouraged this in her. It’s still a work in progress, and it’s getting better.
I cite this morning as a great example. Mary had two soccer games this morning. (Once a year, each team has to play a two-game Saturday.) During the first game, Mary ran hard, but she got a stitch in her side and was in pain. She didn’t whine, though, nor did she get negative on herself. She just went back to the SUV after the game and laid down. She rested, then had a snack, then got ready for game two. In the second game she was even better, and mid-way during the third period SHE SCORED HER FIRST GOAL!!!! It was one of those moments where the action seemed to freeze for a second (because no one knew who was supposed to kick the ball) and Mary reached out with her foot, gave the ball a loft-kick into the air, and it sailed over the opposing team players and into the goal. I was ecstatic (that’s putting it mildly). We finished the game, and on the way home Mary and I talked about everything she’s been doing right: how she’s thinking, paying attention, not giving up, listening to instructions and trying her hardest. We hit a major milestone, and we never would have gotten there without God’s help. We still have a long way to go, but if I pray without ceasing for Mary (and for Hannah, too) I know my girls will have a bright future.
And now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to go do the Happy Dance.